Anger is an acid that can cause more damage to the vessel in which it is stored than to the object on which it is poured. American author Mark Twain How many times have you had to deal with someone who was enraged? Whether they were yelling, swearing, or just being rude, those who work with people know that there are only two ways to deal with someone who is angry: avoid them or be prepared for them to take it out on you.
The number one rule of anger management is to never engage in anger behavior yourself if you want to keep your emotions under control. This means no shouting, no name-calling, and no throwing objects. Anyone who does this will find it difficult to manage their own emotions, much less someone else's.
The next step is to identify the source of the anger. Is it a friend who is mad at you? An employee who is upset with his/her job? Someone new who doesn't know your history? Once you know the reason behind the anger, you can take appropriate action to resolve the situation or prevent it from happening again. If you are able to do this, then the person who is angry will not only stop harassing you, but also feel better because he/she has expressed his/her concerns/issues.
Finally, remember that everyone gets angry sometimes.
Other people's rage does not always have anything to do with you. When you identify this, it may have a significant impact on how you deal with the problem. According to a 2012 study, when participants recognized that they had not caused another person's anger, they were less disturbed by the circumstance.
If you can understand that someone else's anger has nothing to do with you, then you don't have to feel guilty about something you cannot change. The only thing you can change is yourself. This understanding allows you to take responsibility for your own feelings and actions.
Once you realize that another person's anger has nothing to do with you, it becomes easier to handle. You are not responsible for someone else's emotions so there is no need to feel ashamed or guilty if they act out their anger on you.
Anger is simply the feeling that comes with wanting something and being unable to get it. If you recognize that you are not the cause of another person's anger, then you will not feel responsible for their reaction.
You should also know that even though you may not be at fault for someone else's anger, that does not mean that what they are doing is right. Even if you are not responsible for someone else's anger, that does not mean that what they are doing is acceptable. There is a difference between being angry at someone and hurting them through your actions.
In other cases, chronic anger masks other emotions that a person finds intolerable, such as dread, grief, helplessness, and despair. These feelings are usually hidden under a thick layer of anger. They live in the background, rarely getting the attention they deserve. Yet they can have just as devastating an effect on one's health as public displays of anger.
Chronic anger also hides more positive emotions such as joy, hope, enthusiasm, and love. It is these positive emotions that help us get through difficult times and keep us strong. Without them, life would be much harder. However, because they are covered by anger, they never show themselves to others or reach their full potential.
Finally, chronic anger serves as a way for someone to deal with negative thoughts or events. This may include denying something has happened, ignoring evidence to the contrary, or simply refusing to acknowledge it even exists. By keeping all negative things out of sight, the mind is less likely to worry about them.
Although hiding one's emotions is generally not a good idea, there are times when it is necessary. For example, if you are afraid of what others think of you or your reputation, then it makes sense to hide your feelings.